DEVON GRANDY (New York, New York)
As any baseball fan from the Northeast tell you, the baseball season starts at the beginning of April but doesn’t really heat up until the first Yankees-Red Sox series. As it is, the New York-Boston rivalry is now more heated than ever, and not only because of the Sox’ recent success. So while some people may claim to be tired with classic rivalries (really, Michigan-OSU, too?), Break Out The Oreos remains committed to bringing you fair and balanced reporting of the famed rivalry. After all, it is, as described by an anonymous friend of BOTO, “unparalleled in any sport and possibly unparalleled in the entire world, with the possible exception of Israel-Palestine.” Let’s just hope that Boston never gets the Bomb.
Sabotage, curses, and traitors to the cause after the jump: Read More
DEVON GRANDY (New York, New York)
We’re changing the format of our round-ups, particularly those pertaining to the Ivy League; rather than simply arranging the stories alphabetically by which school they pertain to, these posts will open with our favorite of the week’s stories. This will no doubt give the various Ivy communities an extra incentive to be outrageous as they vie for the coveted slot before the jump.
Dartmouth’s frat/alcohol culture continues to bestow important lessons upon its graduates; Jeff Deck (Dartmouth ‘02) has been traveling the nation practicing both douchebaggery and property defacement. Venturing far and wide, Deck utilizes his “typo correction kit” consisting of “permanent and dry erase markers, several types of Wite-Out, chalk, pens and crayons” to fix poor grammar and spelling everywhere he finds it. Because, you know, how can you expect him to correct public and private property with only one type of correction fluid?
Deck’s rationale for his cross-country campaign of obnoxiousness: his inherent “knack for spelling” and his experience writing for The Dartmouth as an Opinion Editor and humor columnist. BOTO would like to state for the record that its own writer also possesses innate grammatical prowess and that he happens to restrict his powers of pomposity to a modest, infrequently-read weblog.
Mass resignations, sexual assault, and fraud after the jump: Read More
DEVON GRANDY (New York, New York)
Columbia’s student government seems to have suddenly gone “all Kenneth Starr up in this” lately, as impeachment proceedings have sprouted up across the board in recent weeks. Join us on our tour of Columbia’s dysfunctional student governments as we travel from the depths of the School of Engineering and Applied Science to the lofty heights of General Studies, all after the jump: Read More
DEVON GRANDY (New York, New York)
BOTO apologizes for the brief hiatus; Spring Break has finally ceased for all of the Ivies, allowing their daily publications to return to providing us with material.
Brown campus tour guides have apparently been embellishing their storytelling with exaggerations; the one about Hay Library containing books bound in human skin, however, remains completely and creepily true. Other common falsehoods perpetuated by the guides include Providence’s hipster community and how “all the best parties are at RISD.”
More after the jump: Read More
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