DEVON GRANDY (New York, New York)
NICOLE CATÁ (New York, New York)
You did it.
It’s been almost twenty months since the junior senator of Illinois announced the commencement of his Presidential campaign.
It’s been four years and three months since a youthful, mostly unknown senator gave a spectacular, spine-tingling keynote address at the 2004 Democratic National Convention.
And now, the stroke of midnight of November 5, 2008 finds Nicole, Devon, and hundreds more celebrating on Broadway on the Upper West Side of Manhattan. Congratulations to President-Elect Barack Obama.
We know the same celebrations are occurring throughout the nation, to which we will say this: celebrate away. You have earned it.
But remember this: we go back to work tomorrow. The culture wars aren’t over. Nor is the economic crisis, nor our two black hole wars in the Middle East, nor our loathsome health care system, nor countless other broken policies that this country must fix.
The Obama campaign intelligently warned its supporters against Election Day complacency. Now we here at Break Out The Oreos warn you against complacency in these coming days, months, and years. There is so much left to do.
Remember our gay and lesbian brothers and sisters who continue to be deprived of their rights as loved ones.
Remember our soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan, who even tonight continue to fight wars that this country didn’t want and certainly didn’t need.
Remember, and let us go out and do good work.
And also remember this: those who didn’t vote for Barack Obama are not the enemy, because they, too, are Americans. They deserve our respect for their beliefs. John McCain deserves our respect, if for no other reason than his superb and classy concession speech earlier tonight.
Good night, and congratulations, America. We love you.
DEVON GRANDY (New York, New York)
We were at Break Out The Oreos try not to get too preachy in our writing; we like to poke some fun, make our point, and pack it up. There are, however, times that merit the momentary suspension of wit in order to better communicate.
Tuesday. November Fourth. It’s Election Day.
But not a normal, run-of-the-mill, every-four-years kind of Election Day. After eight years of jaw-dropping, logic-defying, Constitution-shattering, reputation-destroying scandal upon Bush Administration scandal, America has the opportunity to elect the type of figure that appears only once in a generation. Barack Obama is a figure who transcends politics–his is not only the face of the current Democratic Party, but also that of a new political era: he is an integral part of what we hope will be a new politics, in which Democrats need not be consistently disappointed by their party’s lack of courage and neither party resorts to ignorance, lies, and pettiness to win an election.
So please: we won’t lecture our readership on “civic duty” because we know you’re smarter and better than that. But this one is different. Please go out on Tuesday and make Barack Obama our 44th President. He’s what America deserves.
Oh, and Election Day Countdown is still rolling until Tuesday. Check it out!
DEVON GRANDY (New York, New York)
So you may or may not remember Sarah Palin’s extolling of the “real America”–you know, where “folk” are “hardworking,” “very patriotic,” and “pro-America.” Don’t remember? John Stewart breaks it down:
Well, we here at Break Out The Oreos feel bad about this whole thing; after all, we love baseball and apple pie and our mothers just like those “everyday Americans” in small towns, but on the other hand, we’re pro-choice, Ivy League intellectual, New York elitist pinkos. So what do we do? Are we real Americans? Are we real Americans every day of the week?
Answers to these questions and more in video form, after the jump: Read More
NICOLE CATÁ (New York, New York)
… especially Mondays on which Shea Stadium is renamed “Tadium.” Behold (courtesy of MetsBlog):
This unfortunate moniker has been adopted due to the demolition of Shea, as pictured below:
Oh, well. At least such a Monday will only come to pass once.
More substantial writing to come from this half of the BOTO writing staff after October 30th.
Yours in melodrama,
Nicole
DEVON GRANDY (New York, New York)
So we haven’t been writing, but we’ve sure had a lot on our minds!
Visions of an America under Sarah Palin.- Sarah Palin headbobbing on SNL.
- SNL somehow creating something hilarious from something stupid.
- Mark Wahlberg playing Mark Wahlberg in yet another ridiculously badass movie.
- The new place replaces the old place.
- The Yankees blew it, the Mets blew it, the Cubs blew it, the Dodgers blew it, but the Rays are going to the World Series! Beat the Phillies (says Nicole)!
- Tina Fey is the BOTO Pick for Break Out The Oreos‘ favorite FTWILF (the FTW stands for, among other things, “fabulously talented writer”). For the win!
- The Cowboys suck, and B.J. Upton is living the dream.
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